Koinonia and a "Luv-o-lu-tion"

Koinonia. Up until this morning I had never heard of this word. It is a greek word that appears in the bible which in translation means deep fellowship. Not fellowship as in “let’s hang out at the bowling alley together,” but rather fellowship as in “I will lay down my life down for you.” It means caring so much about the relationship that it leads to a profound shift in both attitudes and behavior.

Who are you in Koinonia with? God? Your spouse? Your kids? Your friends? Think about what it would mean to our world if we were in Koinonia with everyone. The world is in deep need. People are in deep need. Maybe you are in deep need. The solution to need is easy in principle, but hard in action. The solution is generosity. The solution is a Luv-o-lu-tion. ( noun: A dramatic change in the way love works)

Needless to say I had myself a little church this morning, ( K2 in Salt Lake City to be exact), but this message goes beyond my church. This message goes beyond any church. In a world of injustice and pain and suffering and poverty and us versus them and war and terrorism and “Occupy Wall Street” this is a solution.

My 14 year old son is skeptical. Though he admits we should all try to do something good, to be good, he feels it will not collectively make a difference. I respectfully disagree. If we all “ do what we can with what we have where we are” it will make a huge difference. For me giving up on each other is really not an option. Feeling insignificant is not an option. I aspire to live a generous life which my pastor put this way:
- Take time to acknowledge all you have. Give thanks and live in that “attitude of gratitude.”
- Once you have given thanks, no matter how much or how little, but especially if how much, release your grip on it. We are stewards not owners.
- Try to live in “Koinonia.” Live in fellowship and love with one another and be as generous as you can be to each other. Respond to those in need. “Do what you can……

I am sharing this not as a teacher, but as a student. I am not as generous as I can be. I am not as kind as I can be. I am not alot of things I want to be but I can promise you I wake up every day and try. Greed and fear and privilege and entitlement are demons I reckon with ever day. For me, it will be my love and relationship with God that helps loosen their grip.

May you have a blessed day.

We sang the song “I Will Follow You” by Chris Tomlin at church today. It is one of my favorite gospel tunes. If you want to listen click here.

PAY IT FORWARD, EASTER, and GRACE

Last night we sat down with our two children, ages 11 and 13, for a family movie night. We were cruising through titles and stopped dead at "PAY IT FORWARD," one my all time favorites that we had not yet watched as a family due to mature content. It was only after it ended when we started to discuss it that I realized what a perfect film it was for the EASTER weekend. EASTER is all about "Paying it Forward" and what a world we would have if everyone acted about in it.

First the movie. IMDB sums the movie up like this. "A young boy attempts to make the world a better place after his teacher gives him that chance." More specifically the new, maimed, social studies teacher asks his 7th grade students to take on this project for the year, to come up with a NEW idea how to make the world better. Our lead character, an 11 year old boy of an alcoholic mother and abusive father, comes up with the "pay it forward" concept and puts it in to action. For those unfamiliar with the film it means to do something hard and incredibly generous for someone else that likely does not deserve it. Our boy Trevor helps a drug addicted, homeless man get a fresh start, tries to help his mother get off alcohol and stay away from the returning abusive husband, he connects deeply with the very wounded social studies teacher and works to reconnect him to the world, and to love, and more. As he plot unfolds he thinks his idea has failed because the short term outcomes do not match his expectations.

What he does not know until the end of the film is that HE has started a movement. A jaded news paper reporter hundreds of miles away is the recipient of one of these random acts of extreme generosity and when told about 'pay it forward' feels compelled to track the source down. Over the course of the film we discover many lives touched by this one idea and 3 single acts of our boy Trevor. He has changed the world. He has succeeded and now, because of this reporter he knows it.

Is it to bad we don't have a reporter tracking our lives to see the outcomes of our actions or rather, is that a good thing? Well as a Christian I believe I do have that reporter. I believe that every thing I have done and will do in my lifetime I will have to account for. Until I became a Christian the thought of that freaked me out, and was so scary that it kept me at a distance from my faith, but not anymore.

There was a moment many, many years ago when I chose to share with a friend my deepest secret that I had been too ashamed to tell anyone that I discovered GRACE. With tears pouring from my eyes, I acknowledged that I, like these incredibly damaged adults in this movie, was not perfect and was in need of forgiveness and acceptance. I needed to not only be forgiven, but forgive myself for the mistakes I had made ( and continue to make ) and that for me, it was my faith in Jesus Christ that allowed both to happen. That moment changed my life as it was the moment I chose to accept the GRACE that has been offered to me, and is in fact offered to everyone.

"Pay it forward" is not a Christian film per se but within it is the message at the heart of Christianity, and that is that we all deserve to be loved unconditionally and have the opportunity for forgiveness such that we can aspire to become our best selves every single day. Being your best self means not living just for you, but living to serve others. Living to 'pay it forward." That is what makes it such a perfect fill for Easter.

But this movie is for everyone. Regardless whether you believe in God or not, isn't this what you aspire to do? Isn't this what makes the world a better place? I love that this film NAMED IT and put it in a conceptual framework to attempt to have a positive impact on individual and collective behavior. It is the best film I have every seen that builds a narrative around a model of how change happens. ( A Theory of Change - frame it, people get it, people change their behavior on an individual then broader scale, it becomes part of our culture and institutions)

(On Monday I am having an article published that I have been thinking about for years. This article is about "Gender Lens Investing" and will it frame how we can use our for profit investment clout to help advance women and girls. Will behavior change follow? I hope so...)

When the teacher gave these children the assignment and asked them what they thought about it they all said it was stupid, dumb, ridiculous as they did not see themselves as powerful. They did not see themselves as having the POSSIBILITY to positively impact the world at large. Wow. Ask you child this question. Ask the neighbors'. Ask anyone. Then discuss it. It is about paying it forward, it is about living the most generous and loving life we are capable of and at the same time, forgiving ourselves when we are far from perfect. In this film 11 year old Trevor shows his family, his community, that everyone can make a difference.

"Be the Change you want to see in the World." Happy Easter.

Women, Money, and Power...and superheros

My most perfect and amazing visit to NYC continued yesterday. We ( me, my 11 year old daughter and au pair/assistant Mandy ) started the day on Wall Street. I walked with Allie on the exact path I walked thousands of times from the subway to the entrance of 85 BROAD street. I remembered so vividly 23 years ago when I made my way for the very first time, having arrived hours early for day one as an analyst and I sat outside on the benches, shaking, unable to really comprehend how I went from a very small town in Canada to NYC. I decided to film a little video clip in front of the now abandoned headquarters for Goldman Sachs which I will post when I return. Has so much changed for women on Wall Street? Sadly, no.

We did out little tour of downtown including the NY Stock Exchange, the Fed, and of course a picture with the bull, before heading back uptown for lunch, and shopping. I slid in a meeting for Women Moving Millions before attending the SOFA Opening night art show with my buddy and collector Ann Kaplan, a board member of the Museum of ART and Design. It is official. I am a collector of superhero art. The very first piece that caught my attention as I walked in the building was a huge, 68 by48, comic book/paper piece. The title - Where are our heros now? A close up of the piece is pictured and it is made entirely of pieces cut from comic books. A sign you might ask? YES, absolutely. The world needs superheros and darn it I am going to work on that superhero screenplay this year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But the concept is bigger then that. The concept for me is that everyone can be a superhero. Everyone and anyone can and should aspire to be the best they can be and it is in living to that potential that we will create a more just and equitable world for all. "Be the change you want to see in the world."

So that leads me in to dinner where the conversation was about women using their power. My dinner companions were two of the most fabulous women - Author Leslie Bennetts ( of The Feminine Mistake and a contributing editor for Vanity Fair) and Katharine Henderson, President of Auburn Seminary and author of God's Troublemakers - How Women of Faith are Changing the World. I have to run off to a 3 hour Women Moving Millions meeting so cannot write fully about it now BUT let me say this - it is about empowerment. It is about us all developing confidence in their own capacities to make a difference. ( the art piece???) More specifically it is about our economic empowerment meaning that we choose to use our financial resources more fully to drive the change we want to see. Ponder that today.... Another day in New York - yeah me!

"How to Measure Your Life"

I woke this beautiful Sunday morning to find this essay in my in box, sent to me by one of my best friends. This is yet another example, to me, of how I know God is real. Two days ago during our 17 hour car ride home, my husband and I talked about the following:

- Are we living our priorities? If not, why not, and how do we change it. Further to that, we asked ourselves what we care about and is how we spend our time and energy in alignment?

- Is our work aligned with who we are and what we want to be in this world?

- We both have SO MUCH we want to do, so how do we not feel overwhelmed and stressed about it all the time? How do we live in the moment more?

- We have two children. Are we doing a good job parenting them? Now that they are 13 and 10 how do we stop using the tools of reward and punishment, and encourage independent decision making and choices? How do we help them become good and moral citizens of the world?

This essay by the most incredible Clay Christensen answers all those questions and more. Coming from a business background with an obsession for leadership development, it could not have been written better. I had the honor of meeting Clay years ago while at Goldman and thought him incredible then, and incredible now.

For Clay, in case this blog entry gets back to you ( and I hope it does). Thank you for this gift. I share your faith and it has been the guiding force in my life as well. Your decision regarding not to play on Sunday was the right one indeed. I will share this essay with all I know, and in particular my children. We will be praying for you in your transition and for your ongoing good health. Blessings....

Clay's bio. More articles by this author. His web-site.

Barbara............

One of my best friends, Barbara, will be undergoing Breast Cancer Surgery today at 12:30 EST in New York City. My husband Greg will be there with Barbara's husband, and I will be praying for her from BC. Barbara circulated a devotional this morning before being admitted that I would like to share in honor of Barbara.

"Hold my hand, and walk joyously with Me throughout this day. Together we will savor the pleasures and endure the difficulties it brings. Be on the lookout for everything I have prepared for you: stunning scenery, bracing winds of adventure, cozy nooks for resting when you are weary, and much more. I am your Guide, as well as your constant Companion. I know every step of the journey ahead of you, all the way to heaven.

You don't have to choose between staying close to Me and staying on course. Since I am the Way, staying close to Me is staying on course. As you focus your thoughts on Me, I will guide you carefully along today's journey. Don't worry about what is around the next bend. Just concentrate on enjoying My presence and staying in step with Me."

John 14:6

I wrote the poem below quite a few years ago and it is one that means a lot to me and has guided my faith. It is about realizing you are never alone. Never. It is the same message and I take it as a sign from God that the surgery will go brilliantly. Barbara I love you. The poem is called "Walk With Me."

I am walking outside alone

And I begin to shake

I stop a sec and look around

Am I dreaming or awake?

The air it seems way too cool

For this time of year

I begin to get a sense

That the cool is my own fear

I keep walking straight ahead

Knowing not which was too turn

Thinking of all I have left behind

And all that I have learned.

I see something ahead of me

A bench is on the road

As if put there just for me

To help relieve my load.

I sit down to rest and think

As I can no longer stand

Suddenly I’m scared and turn

For there is someone holding my hand.

Do not be afraid he says

I’m here to show you the way

I wake up, get out of bed

And get down on my knees to pray. (J Zehner 2002)

Auburn - "How Women Will Change the World in the 21st Century" and more...

Thursday was a very special day. My dear friend Katharine Henderson was inaugurated as the incoming President of Auburn Theological Seminary, and my did we celebrate both her and Auburn! The opening event was a panel discussion with some of the most incredible women I have ever met, and it was truly magical. Our moderator was Lynn Sherr, award winning broadcast journalist from ABC news ( pictured right), and an expert on Susan B. Anthony. We were brought together by Katharine as women of diverse faith backgrounds, but with much in common, a desire to make the world a better place. This panel was religious diversity in action! We talk often of why having a multitude of perspectives at the table can lead to better and more inclusive outcomes, and if you were there in the room on Thursday ( and I hope you can soon watch it on YOUTUBE) you would have been given the visual of that. My other panelists were as follows:

Maha Alkhateeb - The Co- Director of the Peaceful Families Project and a young Muslim, American woman leader. She is committed to help end domestic violence within Muslim families. Bless you Maha.

Sharon Brous - One of the 50 most influential women Rabbi's who's vision is to "build a Jewish community which stands at the intersection or rich spiritual and religious practice, and social justice. " Sharon spoke of how she tries to help bridge the space between what the world is, and what it ought to be. Sharon, you completely rock.

Yvette Flunder - Presiding Bishop, Senior Pastor of City of Refuge United Church of Christ, and African American. Yvette spoke of the power of the resurection, and how we might do that every day by helping and serving one another. Yvette I am your sister.

.... and last but not least.............

Valarie Kaur - An award winning filmaker, writer and lecturer and a Sikh American that has chosen to take a stand and be a voice of her generation, and her people. The Film is Divided We Fall - " is an end product of a human need to act in the face of racism, violence and disinformation" and I cannot wait to see it. This young, talented women speaks in poetry.. she has such a gift that I swear, she could be the first Sikh Woman President of the United States. She was, is, simply breathtaking in every way. An interview with Valarie. Her blog . The cool thing is she is currently attending Law School at Yale and we are going to have dinner very soon.....

So what did I leave thinking about "How Women Will Change the World in the Twenty-First Century?" That we will come to more significantly share in the power and decision making that shapes our world and in the process we will help redefine what success means and what outcomes are worthwhile. I see women of faith, these women, emerging as powerful voices that speak for justice and community. Our hope comes from men and women working together, in partnership, to heal the world.

Later that day at Bloomberg Auburn hosted another gathering - "Is Good Business Really Good Business? Corporate Character, Conduct and the Bottom Line." The participants were -

Beth Brooke - Global Vice Chair of Public Policy, Ernst and Young ( and a good friend)
Kenneth Feinberg - Special Master for TARP Executive Compensation
David Miller - Director, Princton University Faith and Work Initiative
Peter Rubinstein - Senior Rabbi, Central Synagogue
John Thain - CEO of CIT, Former Head of Merril Lynch and former President of Goldman Sachs ( and my former boss)
Peter Grauer - Chairman of Bloomberg

Unfortunately I cannot 'report' on the off the record conversation but I can share my own opinions on this topic. Of course I believe that ethical behavior is critical in business as it is in life, and I think most if not all people would say that. So the question is do people, do you, do you, do I, behave that way? If not, why not? Do you hold yourself accountable to some absolute level of ethical behavior or do you follow the rule of lowest common denominators? Meaning that if you can find someone that is exhibiting worse behavior then you, then you feel ok about what you are doing. I believe that is what happened on Wall Street, and elsewhere. Take the executive compensation issue. It was in good part the elevated pay of hedge fund managers that pushed Wall Street compensation higher. I heard all these people saying that "Joe Schmoe hedge fund dude make $20 mil last year ( or a billion in some cases ) and he was only a VP at Goldman before that, and I am an MD at GS ( or fill in the blank bank) , and only making $5. That is just not fair." Fair has become way way way to narrow and relative. But then you have to ask yourself how could a person make a billion dollars a year? Because people made the decision to give that person (firm) access to their money (or money they had ficuciary responsibility for ) and paid them 2 and 20 for doing so. No one forced them to do it. They chose to give that manager money and agreed to the compensation structure associated with it. The source of hedge fund assets are largely institutional which means indirectly, we all enabled it.

Do I think it is fair for someone to make a million, twenty million, a billion dollars a year for managing other people's money? What about what Tiger Woods get's paid, is that fair? How about Brad Pitt? Is it fair a child dies at the hand of an abusive parent, or that your sister get's cancer? No... none of this is fair. Yet just because life is not fair does not mean we as individuals should not try to act fairly. All we can do is choose to behave as fairly as we can in our day to day lives which includes being selective about what we do for a living and how we do it, how much money we give away, what products we buy, who we vote for and so on.....

So I don't try to answer the big question about what is fair and instead I rest in knowing God is fair. This is where Auburn and other religious institutions comes in. They create spaces to have these meaningful discussions. Ultimately I believe that I will all be held accountable for how I allocated the resources I have been given - the money, my talents, my opportunities, and so will we all. Life is not fair, God is.

Regardless of your belief system what we all can do is hold CEOs, their boards, their companies accountable, by choosing not to do or not do business with them based on their conduct and their values. This is how we all have the power to affect change. I must have mentioned this quote a hundred times on this blog - "Be the change you want to see in the world."

Happy Sunday.............

The Shriver Report - "A Woman's Nation Changes Everything" PLUS "Shells"

I mentioned this report a while back but I finally received my hard copy and I cannot put it down! It is THE RESEARCH I have been waiting for. The report is filled with facts, stats and great quotes, but it is also a collection of incredible well-written essays by well known writers on some of the most important issues that frame gender equality. The one I read yesterday is called "Has a Man's World Become a Woman's Nation?" by Michael Kimmel and 'it surveys the varied responses that men have had to women's entry into the workforce and to losing the title of sole breadwinner.' Greater gender equality can and should be a win/win proposition. Michael sites some great evidence that it is. You can access it on-line but it is well worth ordering a copy! link here.

A reader of my blog has asked me many time "how do I want to be remembered?" This is how. I want to be remembered, of course, for being a good mother, a good wife, a good friend, a good daughter..... but as it relates to the IT, to the what my life is about, about my purpose, it is to help advance gender equality in our world. Why? Because I truly believe that with greater gender equality comes economic growth, more healthy families, more healthy communities and more peaceful societies. God has put this passion in to my heart. He just has. My work is becoming more and more focused on this, which means I have to say no to a lot of things. BUT. BUT. It is because I said YES to this one thing ( and a very big thing with lots of dimensions), that it allows me to say no to a lot of other things. Ultimately there is only one judge as to whether we do 'enough' with of our lives. Whether we give enough of our time, talent and resources. Please can we stop judging eachother and help one another find our ITS, so that we can know, truly know, that our life has meaning and purpose. ( I want to thank Rob Bell and his Video Teaching SHELLS, for helping me know what I should hold on to, and what i need to let go of)

Rudyard Kipling's - IF

I continuously ask myself the question - "Am I spending my time on this planet wisely? Given the tools and resources I have been given, am I using them well, to build something, or build on to something, responsibly?" I went to bed thinking about this and woke up with this poem, my favorite poem, in my head. I hope you enjoy it.....

Rudyard Kipling's - IF

IF you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,But make allowance for their doubting too;If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,Or being hated, don't give way to hating,And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;If you can meet with Triumph and DisasterAnd treat those two impostors just the same;If you can bear to hear the truth you've spokenTwisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,And lose, and start again at your beginningsAnd never breathe a word about your loss;If you can force your heart and nerve and sinewTo serve your turn long after they are gone,And so hold on when there is nothing in youExcept the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,If all men count with you, but none too much;If you can fill the unforgiving minuteWith sixty seconds' worth of distance run,Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

(but of course I would change another ending, "You will be a woman, my daughter")

In 'googling' for a cool image I came upon this blogsite as my first hit. I just claimed another sister. Her blog theme "Find the Good. Be Inspired" - that is what we all need to continuously do. Have a GREAT Day.

PS - I just noticed that this was my 300 th post!!!! Another reason to celebrate.

"If Wall Street Repents Can Main Street Forgive?"

Last Sunday I co-wrote a piece for the Daily Beast called "Can Goldman Find God?" asking Goldman to put their resources to work to fund job creation. This week they announced their "10,0000 Small Business Initiative." Given this news, the apology by CEO Blankfein, and more... we decided to write another article to follow-up. It is called "If Wall Street Repents Can Main Street Forgive?" If you feel called to comment please do so on the DAILY BEAST site and not on this blog.

I don't think it coincidence that the sermon this morning at church was how to change our culture. Our minister asked us to consider how, as a follower of Christ, do we impact our culture? He suggested three ways - outlove our culture, outthink our culture and outcommitt our culture. This is exactly what I am trying to do in writing about Goldman Sachs, about Wall Street, about Money, about Social Change, about Gender Equality and more. I feel called to leverage my background as a former partner of Goldman Sachs, and a Christ follower, to speak out. We NEED a new form of capitalism to go to work in this country - responsible capitalism, moral capitalism, socially responsible capitalism, enduring capitalism! We need our culture to change - the culture of Wall Street and the culture of Main Street.

I am so far from perfect, and the person I most want to change is myself. I want to live a loving and generous life. A life that honors God and honors others. This is what we are all called to do...

I also think this piece is worth a read "Stop Blaming Goldman Sachs."

Have a great Sunday.

Life's Lessons

I just received this in my inbox and it is too good not to share. It has been a busy and intense week with travel to Washington, a gathering of media powerhouse women to talk about advancing gender equality through the media, a meeting with two amazing women from Iceland who are reimagining financial services and so much more.... but for now, ponder what is below.

"Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me.It is the most-requested column I've ever written.My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good. 2. When in doubt, just take the next small step. 3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. 4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch. 5. Pay off your credit cards every month. 6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree. 7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone. 8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it. 9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck. 10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile. 11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present. 12. It's OK to let your children see you cry. 13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about. 14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it. 15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks. 16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind. 17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful. 18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger. 19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else 20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, and wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special. 22. Over prepare, then go with the flow. 23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple. 24. The most important sex organ is the brain. 25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?' 27. Always choose life. 28. Forgive everyone everything. 29. What other people think of you is none of your business. 30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time. 31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change. 32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does. 33. Believe in miracles.34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do. 35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now. 36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.37. Your children get only one childhood. 38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved. 39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere. 40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back .41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.42. The best is yet to come... 43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up. 44. Yield. 45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift. "

"God versus Goldman Sachs: A Former Partner Challenges Lloyd Blankfein"

Yes that it the headline this morning on the DAILY BEAST - one of the most viewed news sites on the net this Sunday morning. Almost two years ago I decided to throw myself out there and write publically about issues I care about. When I saw the article last week in the Sunday Times about Lloyd saying that Goldman is doing "God's Work", how could I not respond? Especially given that I am married to a pastor and we were both Goldman Partners.

Even though I left Goldman seven years ago, I will forever be a partner of the firm, and for that reason and many more I continue to care deeply it. For years I gave speeches on the firm's culture, the firm's structure, and actively recruited countless young people to 85 Broad Street. I was a corporate cheerleader to the utmost degree, and for that reason and my trading profitability, I was promoted. Becoming a partner changed my life forever, and that of my husband, because ultimately it gave us enough money to commit our lives to non-profit work and of course, our family. For us, what we recieved was enough, more then enough, and we will be forever grateful. My husband returned to school and to get his masters of divinity and is now an associate pastor at our church in New Canaan CT. In fact he just ran out the door as he is preaching this morning on change. He has worked passionately for nine years for our church, and because of GOLDMAN, can do so without getting paid. Thank you Goldman. My passion is for women and girls. I have written on this often on this blog but I as believe that a key factor in our world becoming a more just and equitable place is greater gender equality. I serve on many non-profit boards and increasingly have given speeches, appear on television, and write about why we need more women in positions of leadership and power. ( ... and more) Thank you Goldman. I can give you a very long list of other people that have 'retired' to serve the world BECAUSE, in part, of the culture we experienced while at Goldman.

So yes I had to write this piece, and I am so gratefuly that my friends Rev. Katharine Henderson, President of Auburn Seminary, and Rev. JC Austin could write it in partnership with me. Greg would have been up for the task too if he did not have to write his guest sermon this week. So Lloyd YES I am challenging you because I know you are up for the challenge. Goldman's reputation has been damaged and you need to do something about it, and something BIG. This in the best interest of your people and your shareholders. I suggested in a earlier blog post that it should be around job creation, economic security and financial literacy, and this "Virture Fund" could target just that. As the piece says, I expect more of Goldman Sachs because it is my recollection from my time ( 14 years) there that Goldman Sachs and it's people have always expected more of themselves.



So since it is Sunday, and we are talking about God, and I am a Christian I will end with a prayer, something I have not done on this blog before - "Dear Heavenly Father. The world is not a fair place, but we know that you are fair. So many people, your people, your children, are suffering and we pray you hear them and you comfort them. We pray today that you will help us all choose actions that will make this world better. We pray that you CHANGE our hearts to hear the cries of others, and that will drive our actions. We pray that you make us all generous people, because you are so generous with us. We know you expect a lot from us because you know what we are capable of. We know that you tell us that to those to which much is given much is expected. We know that it is in serving that we will find our peace and our joy. We pray this in your name - Amen.



Have a great Sunday.

Changing the World - Critical Mass

I have been thinking about this a lot this week, mainly because my husband Greg is preaching on change this Sunday at church. Can people change? How do people change? What is the process of change? Why do people change? We all have our opinions on this and I believe we all have our own theory of change, meaning how we think change can happen. For me I think about it a lot in the context of how can the world change to become more gender balanced. The Women's Funding Network has a model - The Five Indicators of Social Change - that I believe is truly brilliant. Here it is.


The Five Indicators of Social Change

A Shift in Definition - The issue is defined differently in the community or larger society.
A Shift in Behavior - People are behaving differently in the community or larger society.
A Shift in Engagement - People in the community or larger society are more engaged. Critical mass has been reached.
A Shift in Policy - An institutional, organizational, or legislative policy or practise has changed.
Maintaining Past Gains - Past Gains have been maintained generally in the face of opposition.

This is how you use this framework. Think about what you want to change and apply it to this framework. Take my passion - We need more women in critical mass in positions of leadership and influence in the financial services sector.

Definition - We need to make the case for why this is important. We need women because it leads to better decision making and a higher return on equity.
Behavior - Based on the above, boards of directors choose to add more women, CEOS starts walking the walk not just talking the talk. ( as examples)
Engagement - More and more companies do this, it becomes why aren't you doing this?
Policy - Companies broadly adopt a critical mass principle and more.
Past Gains - Advocacy continues and the business case is validated over time.

Think about what you want to change and put it in this framework. There are specific strategies within each one of these shifts which need to be employed - but that would be a very long blog entry indeed.

Oprah Magazine, Women and Power

Webster's defines POWER as "the capability of doing or effecting something." By that definition we all have it, though some clearly have more than others. In this month's issue of OPRAH Magazine she features 20 women who Oprah sees as using their power wisely. "The list are remarkable visionaries flexing their muscles in business and finance, politics and justice, science and the arts. Their power isn't based on their money, fame or status in the boardroom—real power is so much more than that." It is a wonderful list and includes one of my personal heros that I had the honor of meeting this year, Lilly Ledbetter. ( pictured right) Lilly fought tirelessly on the issue of equal pay and her passion resulted in the passing of the '"Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act" this spring.

Power. We all have it. We all have to use it to create the change we want to see in the world. I feel this is especially true for women who too often fail to embrace their power. I truly believe that the empowerment of women will be the force that will change our world for the better and set a course for the future that has as it's goal to create a more just and equitable world.

Beautiful ( Afghanistan) - Guest Post.

On January 13, 2009 the New York Times reported on an incident occurring in Kandahar, Afghanistan, on November 12, 2008 in which men sprayed the faces of several young girls attending a school with acid, disfiguring at least one girl seriously. Some of the men were arrested, but no tie to any organization was established. The article speculated that the Taliban was behind it. All the girls have since returned to school.

Not one of the girls
Eyed by the boys
Sitting by the wall
Fingering my veil
Trying to follow
Where is Brazil? . . .
Why was I there
At that instant
A moment earlier
A moment later
Grabbing and twisting
Then flash of pain
Purple-etched in my face
Forever . . .
Not a leaflet dropped
In the dead of night
Nor a placard waved
By an angry crowd
Just a girl walking
Down a rutted road
On the way to school

Preston Tsao

Thank you Preston for these words that awaken us to the injustices of the world. I remember when we had coffee and you told me about this article and how it affected you. You honor that girl with this poem and we honor you for writing and sharing it.....

President Carter says - "Invest in Women"

A friend just sent me this piece from THE HINDU called "We Must Challenge The Way So Many Faiths Treat Women." It is an exceptional read by humanitarian and former US President, Jimmy Carter. I could not agree more that "religion has provided a reason or excuse for the deprivation of women’s equal rights across the world for centuries" and it has to end. My favorite lines were these...." The evidence shows that investing in women and girls delivers major benefits for everyone in society. An educated woman has healthier children. She is more likely to send them to school. She earns more and invests what she earns in her family." Sound familiar? This is the logic model that drives me in the work that I do in the world and is the logic model behind the Women's Funding Movement. Thank you President Carter for your words and your wisdom.

A Poem - Walk With Me

I wrote the poem below some time ago, 2002 to be exact. I don't remember what was going on in my life when I wrote it, but I keep on pulling it out when I am struggling to make decisions and when I am struggling to understand exactly what God wants me to do with my life. There are so many forks in the road. So many. Sometimes too many. Should it be a coincidence that one of my fav songs has always been Galileo by the Indigo Girls? (click here for the amazing words) I hope you like it. Had to share....

Walk With Me

I am walking outside alone
And I begin to shake
I stop a sec and look around
Am I dreaming or awake?

The air it seems way too cool
For this time of year
I begin to get a sense
That the cool is my own fear

I keep walking straight ahead
Knowing not which was too turn
Thinking of all I have left behind
And all that I have learned.

I see something ahead of me
A bench is on the road
As if put there just for me
To help relieve my load.

I sit down to rest and think
As I can no longer stand
Suddenly I’m scared and turn
For there is someone holding my hand.

Do not be afraid he says
I’m here to show you the way
I wake up, get out of bed
And get down on my knees to pray.

My Washington Trip! - Tiffany Circle

Train to Washinton. Learnvest. Learn Earn Invest. Angel $. Women. Financial education. 25 yr old. House. Park City. Move? Residential real estate. No buyers. Change. Good? Arrive Washington. Check in. Red Cross Tiffany Circle Summit 2009. French Embassy. The Honorabole Pierre Vimont. Bonjour. Charming. 350 women. Concert. Kennedy Center. Amy Grant. Vince Gill. Michael McDonald. Melinda Doolittle. Darius Rucker. (Hooty and the Blowfish). Allison Kraus. Announcement. ChallengeAmerica.com. Wounded solidiers. Serving our country. Disabled. Heros. Sleep. Am. David Sanderson. Survivor Flight 1549. Survival = Teamwork + Leadership + Faith in God. “God’s hands were on the plane that day. “You never know when and if, one day, you have to cash in everything you have learned in life.” Humble. Grateful. Red Cross International Program. Measles. Today. 540 children will die. Answer? Vaccinations. National Women’s Memorial. Arlington Cemetery. Brigadier General Wilma Vaught. Most highly decorated woman in US History. Cool. Women serve. Supreme Court of the United States. Justice Anthony Kennedy. “Law and freedom are linked together. The law should be a hope to be embraced. Not something to be feared.” History. Red Cross. Chairman Bonnie McElveen Hunter. Ceo Gail McGovern. Amazing women. Amazing. Try to imagine the world without the Red Cross? No… don’t. We need them. Blood. Disaster relief – big, small and everything in between. Measles. Preparedness. Disease Prevention. Maternal health. Bed nets. Volunteerism. Trust. A Lovemark. Serving the needs of our country’s military personal and their families. Restoring family links. Tiffany Circle. 500 women. 350 showed up. Collective giving. Collective action. The Womens Funding Movement. Train. Home.

(photo - Jacki and Kayrita with Justice Kennedy)

Motherhood

"The most important thing she'd learned over the years was that there was no way to be a perfect mother and a millions ways to be a good one."

- Jill Churchhill, Crime and Punishment (1989)

Mother’s day is a big day for me. Why? Because it is the day I truly reflect on how well I am doing at the most important role God has given me. ( yes I wish it was a day I just slept in and watched movies in bed) My roles as a wife, a daughter, a professional, a giver, a friend ….. are all important too, but being a mother, that is at the top of the list. My son just turned 12 on Friday and my daughter recently turned 9. My husband wanted more children, and in hindsight that would have been nice, but it just did not work out that way. Honestly I felt when I was pregnant motherhood was too much of me. It was all of me. Fully pregnant you cannot go anywhere without it being ‘the thing’ about who you are, and it was not comfortable then and it is still not comfortable. Being a mother will never be for me, THE THING, I am. It will be one of the things I am, and yes, the most important thing I am. Maybe that is why I always worry whether I am ‘good enough?’ When I pulled out the quote book this morning and read the 100 that are listed on this topic this is the one that really resonated. It is easy to figure out why – because I have yet to accept it. I don’t live in the certainty that I am a really good parent, I live in the hope of it. One day when my kids are older, I pray they will look at me with truth and love in their eyes and say “Mom, you were and are many things, and being a GOOD parent was one of them.”

So may I suggest that this be your gift to your mother today? Call her and say “Mom, you should know that I feel you have always been a good mother. Not because you were perfect, but because you did the best you could and that down deep, I always knew that.”

I am sending out a big shout out to all my readers who are mothers, and all of those who want to be one day. Blessings…………… Jacki

Knowledge, Activism and Engagement

What role are you going to take in shaping our future? I started this blog a year and one half ago because I was so fired up about what was going on in the economy, and what we were being 'told', that I just had to respond in a more public way. I have written much about the economy, about the markets, and most importantly, about what we can do to change the world for the better. I ask you to make this moment the moment, that you decide to truly engage. Figure out what you are passionate about, what matters to you, what makes you nuts, and get engaged. Really engaged. Our future is not tomorrow, or next week, or next year, it is being shaped this very moment. Speak out, act out and be the change you want to see in the world.

"First they came for the communists, and I did not speak out-- because I was not a communist;

Then they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out-- because I was not a socialist;

Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out-- because I was not a trade unionist;

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out-- because I was not a Jew;

Then they came for me-- and there was no one left to speak out for me.

Martin Niemoeller – German pastor and theologian in Nazi Germany

"The Grasp of Your Hand"

LET ME NOT PRAY TO BE SHELTERED FROM DANGERS, BUT TO BE FEARLESS IN FACING THEM.

LET ME NOT BEG FOR THE STILLING OF MY PAIN, BUT FOR THE HEART TO CONQUER IT.

LET ME NOT CRAVE IN ANXIOUS FEAR TO BE SAVED, BUT HOPE FOR THE PATIENCE TO WIN MY FREEDOM.

GRANT ME THAT I MAY NOT BE A COWARD, FEELING YOUR MERCY IN MY SUCCESS ALONE: BUT LET ME FIND THE GRASP OF YOUR HAND IN MY FAILURE.

RABINDRANATH TAGORE

" 1861-1941"

My friend Kim sent this prayer to me. She has been such a support to her friend Sam who is dying from cancer. This wonderful woman and mother is only in her forties. Kim and Sam, I am just sending you both by love and God's warm embrace.